My Baby's Almost a Toddler!

Morgan turned the big O-N-E a few weeks ago! As most mothers would agree, the time has flown by with amazing speed. She's becoming more and more of a "real person" as the days pass. She's still not officially a "toddler", since she's not really walking, yet. She has taken up to 6 steps, though! I'm not in much of a hurry for her to begin walking, but it is still exciting when she takes those little steps.

She had her 12-month appointment and she's weighed 23 1/4 pounds, was 31 inches tall, and I didn't get the head circumference. She's in the 75th percentile for weight, 85th for

height and 95th for head circumference. They gave her the MMR, Chicken Pox and some other vaccine, along with her flu shot. My poor baby had to have 4 needles in her that day and she was not a happy camper. Once again, a couple of days after her flu shot, she had a really rough night. I despise those flu shots! Her other vaccines have never caused her any problems.

She's still on soy formula, since we were waiting to take her for a visit with a board-certified pediatric dermatologist. It was pretty much a waste of time, because all he said was "she has eczema", and gave me a handout and a prescription for some foam for her scalp. He did give us the "OK" to try milk, again, though. We'll be trying 2% milk on Frid

ay. He said he didn't believe her problems with eczema were food related. I'm still nervous about the transition.

Going to milk and, in particular, weaning off the bottle is going to be very stressful for me. I know, obviously, it won't be a picnic for Morgan, either, but I'm so nervous because the bottle has magical curative powers for Morgan. No matter what ails her, a bottle always fixes it, or at least stops the crying. I know soothing with food isn't the best option, long term, unless I want a 100-pound 5 year-old, but it really gets the job done, for now.

She's still waking up once a night, most nights and she's thirsty for her "milk"! I know this is a learned thirst, but I'm getting anxious about breaking that habit. She had gone without night feedings for quite a while, but slipped back into the habit a couple of month ago. I guess I can still give her a little water, but I'm afraid that in her sleepy state, she'll try to drink it like a bottle and choke on the sippy cup. Maybe I'll have to keep one bottle for emergencies. ;)

She's doing very well with the few signs I've taught her, and that makes me really happy. She uses the "more" sign to tell me she wants more food/drink, but she also uses it to say she's hungry. She never really caught onto the "milk" sign, which is funny to me, since it's her favorite thing in the world. She gets so excited when I'm shaking the bottle to mix the formula and you'd think she had been in the desert for a week with the panting and lip smacking. She has mastered the "all done" sign and uses it to tell me when she has had enough food/milk/whatever. I just noticed she has decided to clap her hands to say "yes", when I ask her if she wants something. I guess I should work on the real sign. It thrills me to be able to communicate with her and I'm looking forward to more "real words" being added to her vocabulary.

Right now, pretty much everything is "that" or "dada". She points at EVERYTHING and says "dat"/"that" all the time. She says "light" sometimes when she points at light fixtures, and I think she sometimes tries to say "ball", but that's about it. She constantly calls me "dada" and it drives me crazy, ha, ha. She'll say "mama" every once in a while, so maybe she knows she's picking on me and is doing it for fun! She still loves to "read" her books and enjoys pointing to all the things she can and identifying them, as "dada", of course.

She has started dancing this adorable "twist" dance. I don't know where she picked it up, but I love it. She did this cute dance when her Daddy came home from work today. It's funny, because it's very similar to my "gopher dance" that I used to do when happy. I don't think she has ever seen me do it, so now I'm wondering if the "gopher dance" is genetic. :)

Well, I need to get to sleep, but I wanted to write something, since it has been a while.

Here are a few of our pictures from her 12-Month Sears Portraits session:

Time's Flying By...

Whoops! It has been way too long since my last blog entry!

Morgan is doing well and growing so tall! She can pull up and stand and she "cruises" around the living room. She stands up in her crib and drives me crazy, but I love how she takes notice of everything, inspecting even the tiniest dot on the floor. She even tries to eat some of those "dots" and that always keeps me on my toes. She'll be a whole year old next month, and it blows my mind! She turning into a real person, right before my very eyes. I've been having to rock her sleep a lot, lately, but I'm not really minding, since I won't have the privilege forever and am enjoying it while it lasts.

I am going nuts with her eczema, though. I just cannot stop her from scratching her hands and I feel so bad for her at night, when she seems to be so itchy. I've sewn several "baby straight-jackets", which are just onesies with the sleeves sewn shut, but she manages to get out of every contraption that I've fashioned. I'm continuing to hope that she outgrows this, or that it will get better over time. Luckily, her face is fairly clear most of the time, but her hands, ankles, etc., get pretty scraped up from all her scratching. Thankfully, the weather is getting cooler and starting to match her head-to-toe wardrobe.

I'm in the process of planning Morgan's first birthday parties. She's having a family party on the weekend of her birthday, and a playgroup party on her actual birthday, which is on a Monday. I need to think of snacks and favors for 30 kiddos - my little baby has more friends than I do! I'm so glad I joined the Stay at Home Moms Playgroup, though. She just flourishes, surrounded by her friends, playing and interacting and learning. The mommies in the group are great, which is a big added bonus. I would have been so lonely if I had not joined this group. I love seeing Morgan acknowledge other babies and kids and finally start to interact with them. At her first few play dates, she just slept. ;) She was only 2 months old, so that was to be expected. Now, she crawls around, smiling at her friends, giving them pats and "kisses" on the head.

She's not walking just yet, but she can stand pretty well, and I'm not in a big hurry for that to happen. She also doesn't have any teeth, but again, all in good time.

Well, I need to run, she's waking up from her afternoon nap. Here are a few pictures:

My big girl standing at a children's table...

At the pumpkin patch...can you spot my little pumpkin?

Enjoying the bubbles at playgroup:

Ear Infection Update

OK, so we took Morgan to the doctor and he said it definitely looks like the non-allergic amoxicillin rash. I find the term "non-allergic rash" to be an oxymoron, but anyway...He said her ear infection was looking much better and that we didn't need to switch to a new antibiotic. In fact, he said she could stop taking the amoxicillin. He didn't want to label her as "allergic to amoxicillin", either, since she didn't have any other reactions. He said there's nothing we can do about the rash - it will just have to run its course, which could take 7-10 days. My poor baby already has eczema, she doesn't need new rashes! Well, I'm very glad she'll be off those antibiotics. I think they were causing her mood swings, poor sleep, etc. I expect her to improve much more quickly, now. Hooray! :)

9 Month Update - Running a Little Behind...

Morgan turned 9 months old a little over a week ago. She had her 9-month pediatrician appointment last Monday. She weighed 22 pounds, measured 28.5 inches long and her head circumference was 46 cm. All of these values were in the 90th percentile! I was really looking forward to this appointment, as I was told there wouldn't be any shots. Well, the pediatrician said he "lied" and they had received their shipment of flu shots. They were expecting an early flu season, so they offered us the shot. Not wanting to turn down protection for our baby, we agreed to give her the shot. She let out one squeal, but I had her bottle ready and popped it in her mouth and she was a happy camper. I watched her closely for the rest of the day to watch for reactions, but she was fine.

Then, 2 days later, on Wednesday evening, she started to look a little down and extra tired and fussy. I chalked it up to being sleepy and put her to bed. I woke up at 1:00 a.m. to the sound of an odd cry. She was crying in a way that sounded different and I didn't wait to see if she'd go back to sleep. I rushed in her room and picked her up and she was burning up! She was moaning and her whole body just felt so hot to the touch. My husband got up to see what was going on and he picked her up and we headed to the kitchen to take her temperature. She looked ill and then began to vomit, but she was choking on it and it scared me. She only choked for a second and then it all came out. After she threw up, her temperature started to come down. It was at 102ºF, but had come "down" to 100º. I was about ready to head to the ER, because I didn't know what was going on, but we decided to give her a minute and see how she did. I gave her a little bit of water and she was very thirsty. I thought that was a good sign (that she wanted to drink.) She even gave me a little smile. I called the nurse line and she said as long as her fever was below 104º, there was no need to take her anywhere. I asked if she thought it was a side effect of the flu shot from 3 days before and she said it was possible. She said to just try and get her back to sleep, since she was undoubtedly tired. We put her back to bed and she fell asleep.

The next day, she was fussy on and off all day long and she kept a temperature around 99º/100º. I hadn't given her more Tylenol, as I was waiting to talk to the pediatrician's office. I spoke with another nurse and she said it very well could be the flu shot giving her the fever. I resumed giving her Tylenol and that kept the fever down. Thursday night, I gave her a dose of Tylenol around 6:00 p.m. Pretty much as soon as it wore off, at around 10:30 p.m., I heard her cry again and went to get her and she was burning up again. Due to lack of sleep, I can't recall whether she threw up that time, but I gave her some more Tylenol and she went back to sleep. She also awoke again at 4:00 and I fed her and she drank almost the whole bottle. She slept until 6:00 and I got her up and thought she was a little better. However, she still seemed warm and was making odd sounds. I put her in the highchair and started making a bottle. I heard more off sounds and looked at her (I had turned the highchair a little so I could see her) and she was turning red and choking on vomit again. This time was even scarier than the first time, as her eyes were red and she seemed in distress. I ripped the tray off the chair and pulled her out and luckily she cleared what was stuck and started breathing. Two near heart-attacks in two days was enough for me. I called the pediatrician's office when they opened and they said the earliest appointment available was for 10:45 a.m., which seemed like years from then. They said if we went to the E.R., we could wait all day and I agreed, so I made the appointment. My husband took the day off from work and we took her in to the doctor. She was looking/feeling much better by then and we joked that it seemed silly to be bringing a smiling baby into the office. However, with her waking up 2 nights in a row and choking on vomit, I had to have her checked.

We saw a nurse practicioner and she checked her over and found that it wasn't the flu shot that was bothing her, but instead, a mild ear infection. She prescribed the antibiotic Amoxicillin. We had to wait an hour on the prescription, but Morgan's fever was already down and staying down. We got the medicine and she did NOT like it. It hadn't been refrigerated yet, which is supposed to improve the taste. She spent most of Saturday and Sunday alternating between smiling and crying. One of the side effects is mood swings and I believe she had them. She would actually smile then immediately start crying actual tears, poor thing. Last night, Sunday night, I was putting her in her pajamas and noticed she had a rash over her entire torso, front and back. It was exactly like the pictures I had seen when researching Amoxicillin side effects. It was called a "non-allergic amoxicillin rash". My poor baby seems to be the "lucky one", getting those side effects that only 5-10% of users experience. :( I called the pediatrician's office, though, because I read that the rash must be looked at, to rule out a true allergic reaction. So, we now have an appointment for 9:15 a.m.

I'm so sad that she's sick, but I keep telling myself how lucky we are that she didn't get this sick when she was under 3 months old. I would have hated for her to have to get a spinal tap for fever, etc. This is really her first time being sick, so I'm glad that she's a healthy, robust 9-month-old baby, with reserves to get her through her waning appetite.

Oh, and another thing I wanted to add was that this illness has not slowed down her development, which I think is great. She learned to make the "Ba" sound and has been "talking" up a storm the past couple of days. She has said "bay bay", "bah bah", "bob", etc. I just love it! On top of that, last night, my husband called me into the living room to show me something. He had her standing up, holding on to the front of her walker and she was making perfect walking movements! She was taking slow steps forward, as he held the walker, to keep it from running away from her. She definitely can't walk behind it alone, but it was still amazing to see!

I'll post another update later...

Sleep Training Update!

OK, so on Friday night, Morgan was supposed to go all night without eating. Technically, I think she did, because she slept 8 hours, before crying to be fed. However, this was at 3:00 a.m., so it depends on how you look at it. I was thinking about it and I don't think it's quite time to totally wean her off night feedings. I'm not very good about giving her enough solids during the daytime, so I think one night feeding, as long as she sleeps past midnight, is fair. She has been doing such a great job and when she cries at 2 in the morning, I know she's really hungry and not just asking for milk to be put back to sleep. She has proven to me that she can put herself to sleep on her own, so there's no need to force the issue on night feedings, just yet.

Saturday night, she only slept 4 hours and woke up at 11:00 wanting milk, though. Normally, I'd make her wait until after midnight, but I was late giving her solids and kinda messed up her feeding schedule, again, she shouldn't suffer for my mistakes. I fed her about 2.5 ounces and then she slept another 5hr15min. After that, I fed her a little more and she slept another 2 and half hours. Her total sleep for that night was 11 hours and 45 minutes, which is amazing to me!

Last night was a even better. I've read that "sleeping through the night" is sleeping 5 hours straight, usually from 12a-5a. Morgan went to bed at 7:30p and slept all the way to 5:15a! She did let out a single cry at 2:30a, but it was in her sleep, so I say that doesn't count. ;) She was very hungry when she woke up at 5:15a, and she had slept almost 10 hours, so I gladly gave her a little water and then a little milk. She slept from 5:30a-7:00a, for a total of 11 hours 10 minutes, with only one waking/feeding. This is a first for my sweet baby and I'm so proud of her! It only took her 8 months, but she finally slept through the night!

Sleep Training - Week One almost complete! I ♥ Dr. Ferber!

As some of you may know, Morgan has never slept well. Only a few times in her life did she sleep 5+ hours straight. Her typical routine is to go to bed and wake up just about every sleep cycle. I was in her room every 45 minutes to an hour, most nights. Sometimes she'd sleep 2-3 hours at a time and give me a little break. Ever since she was a newborn, I've been reading books on baby sleep and doing research on the web. I've read the following 3 books: The Baby Whisperer (BW) by Tracy Hogg, Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems (SYCSP) by Dr. Richard Ferber, and The No-Cry Sleep Solution (NCSS) by Elizabeth Pantley. They are all good books, by respected authors. I believe the first book I read was the BW and I find it more helpful now, than I did when she was a small baby. I just couldn't seem to get into a structured routine, while at the same time trying to figure out what to do with a baby. The next book I got was the Ferber book and it is the best of the 3, when it comes to explaining the nature of baby sleep. He is a baby sleep expert and I found the information very helpful. Baby's just don't sleep like adults do, and I had a lot of learning to do on the subject. I was initially very wary of letting Morgan cry for any period of time, though, so I went out and bought the NCSS. I felt that the author was on a bit of a "high horse" about how her method did not involve crying, like that meant it was superior. The NCSS is different, not better. The BW and Ferber methods are also different, and not better/worse. I believe I went out and bought 3 tools and one ended up being right for the job at hand and the others were valid tools, but for someone else's workshop.

Let me provide a little more background before I get into recounting our sleep training. I distinctly remember watching an episode of "Mad About You", many years ago, where they had their little baby in her crib, behind closed doors and they were letting her "cry it out". Jamie was sitting on the floor, outside the door, with Paul and crying and wanting to go to her and saying something to the effect of, "I don't want her to think that nobody's going to be there for her and that she's all alone in the world." It was a touching scene and I decided then that I'd never leave my baby alone to "cry it out". It seemed like a cruel process and I didn't think I could ever do such a thing.

When I read the Ferber book, however, I realized that his method was not at all like the "crying it out" (CIO) that I had heard about. In my mind, CIO is leaving your baby alone, locked in their room, to cry for hours until they pass out from exhaustion and accept the fact that nobody's listening or coming to help them, so they might as well just shut up and sleep. THAT's the CIO that I was very much against. Ferber's method does not involve abandoning your child so that they lose faith in the world. As a friend put it, "he does changes their habits without breaking their spirit".

Ferber's method involves putting your child to bed awake (which is the same suggestion as in most baby sleep books), so that they learn to put themselves to sleep without the use of "crutches" like eating/nursing, being rocked, patted, walked around, etc. You are to go through a loving bedtime routine, which can include a bath, book, song, etc. After you place your baby in the crib and tell them that you goodnight and that you love them, you leave. When you do this, your baby's going to cry. Crying is their only form of communication and they are going to use it to tell you that they are not pleased. I should add that before you place them in the crib, you are to do a safety check and make sure that they are fed, dry and not suffering any discomfort that would otherwise explain their crying. That way, you know that their crying is merely a protest to a change in their routine.

Morgan had become used to the following routine: pajamas and a bottle of milk. She would fall asleep drinking that bottle of milk and then I would burp her on my shoulder and she'd be asleep as I got up and placed her gently in the crib and snuck out of the room. She'd roll over and go right to sleep, without a fuss. However, 30-60 minutes later...WAH!!! She'd cry for me to come soothe her. She'd probably eat every time, but I'd make her wait a few hours between feedings. Every night, I'd have 3-4 bottles of water ready and formula in the dispenser. In total, she drank about 6-8 oz. at night. It didn't matter how little or how much I fed her during the day. I soon realized that it was habit, more than hunger, driving these frequent night wakings.

When Morgan was 4 months old, I decided to give Ferberizing a try. The standard plan is to start with a 5-minute wait time. I didn't really have a bedtime routine then, so I just placed her in the crib. I went to the other room and she went bananas! She was screaming and after the 5 minutes was up, I went in and she had turned herself all around in the crib and was pitching a major hissy fit. I went away for another 5, unable to do 10 and when I went back, she was livid. She was looking at me with this pleading look - "why are you doing this to me??" So, I picked her up out of the crib, told her I was sorry and abandoned the project. She just wasn't ready and I wasn't doing it right.

I then decided to try out the No-Cry plan. It involves mostly the same principles, but instead of leaving the baby in the crib, you pick them up each time and put them down and give them the "shush-pat", where you make a "shush" sound and pat them on the back. This is an exhausting plan, because you might have to pick them up and put them down 10-15 times before they go to sleep. I don't see how this is a "no cry" plan, though, because she cried every time I put her back down and most of the time while I was holding her, too. It actually made her more upset if I'd pick her up and put her back down. She'd get more and more upset each time, instead of being calmed. I'd end up having to feed her to sleep to stop her crying. The logs in the NCSS book even have a space for "time spent crying" or something to that effect, and it's just supposed to lessen over time. I don't think it's fair for them to call themselves a "no-cry"solution. I honestly don't think there is such a thing. A baby is not going to like you taking away their sleep crutches or changing what they are used to and they will protest and the way babies protest is to cry. It's like she wants to stick a fork in an electrical outlet and I'm telling her she can't and she's crying.

Anyway, I tried to get some help from parents who had successfully sleep-trained with a "no-cry" method, but I couldn't find anyone. I was nearing 8 months of basically no sleep and I needed to find something that worked. After reading more and more and more, I decided to try Ferber again. I spoke to other mothers who had successfully Ferberized, without rendering their babies insane. They all tweaked the method to suit their needs and I decide to go with Ferber's alternate interval plan that starts with a single minute of wait time.

My husband rigged up our camcorder, which has a night-vision setting, and placed it on the shelf near her crib and hid it behind the shelf curtains. He hooked it up to a spare flat-panel computer monitor in the other room. That way, I could see her and know that nothing was wrong and go in earlier, if she looked like she was in distress. This made a world of difference in making the process tolerable. Nobody wants to hear their baby cry, and it's even worse when you're imagining what they're doing in the other room. Is she spinning around? Is she shooting laserbeams out her eyes??

(Wow, I just realized this is a ridiculously long blog...sorry!)

We decided to start on a Friday night, so my husband could offer more support, if needed. I decided the bedtime routine would be bottle (well before bedtime), pajamas, book(s), bed. I couldn't add a bath to the routine because of her eczema. Another really helpful addition to the process was the purchase of Huggies Overnites diapers. They are the best! They keep her so dry at night, no matter how much she wets. I never have to change her at night. Even when she drank a ton of milk at night and wet and wet and wet, her skin would be smooth and dry in the morning.

So, I put her in her jammies, read her a few books and turned off the lights. I held her close for a few minutes and sang her a little song. I told her that I loved her and that it was time for "night night" and I put her in the crib. She immediately began fussing and I patted her and told her it was OK and it was time for bed. I said a few more sweet words and then I left the room. I went to the other room and started the 1-minute timer. I watched on the monitor as she cried and rolled around, wondering what the heckamazoo was going on. I sat there for the longest 60 seconds, reminding myself that she was clothed, fed and dry and was just protesting. After the minute passed, I went to her crib and patted her and told her that everything was OK. She cried harded at seeing me, but then she settled down and I left again for another minute. This extended to 3 minutes, then 5 minutes. I had put her in the crib at 7:45 p.m. By 8:25 p.m., she had settled down, found a comfortable position and was sleeping soundly. The total "fuss time" for Night 1 was 40 minutes. - and it's not like she cried for 40 continuous minutes. It was broken up by my visits. She then slept for 4 hours straight, which was a wonderous improvement over her normal routine. She woke up at 12:25 a.m. and I fed her a few ounces. Another part of the process is weaning off the night feeds, so for Night 1 she had to go 2.5 hours between feedings and she had gone above and beyond my expectations. After I fed her, she slept another 5 hours! She awoke at 5:45 a.m. and I fed her a little more and she slept until 7:30 a.m. That was another 1.5 hours, for a total night's sleep of 10.5 hours. We went to wake her up at 7:30, so I don't know how much longer she would have slept, but I didn't want to let her sleep too late and throw off the next day. She was a happy camper when my husband and I went to get her out of the crib. It was probably the most restful night she had experienced in her entire life. Morgan has always been a happy baby, despite her lack of sleep, but she was in an impossibly good mood that day.

I continued the process for the next day's naps and she fussed and wiggled for about 15 minutes, before falling asleep. Again, she didn't cry that whole time. She definitely cried for the first couple of minutes, but then she tossed and turned to find a comfy spot and then drifted off to sleep.

That night (Night 2) she only fussed for FIVE minutes and went to sleep. She caught onto the routine very quickly and I was amazed. When she was down for a nap, I waited longer than the 1-minute interval, because she was settling and I knew that if I went in there, she'd feel the need to put on a show of protest for me. With me out of the room, she was free to get settled and go off to sleep.

Nights 3-7 were as follows: (remember that fuss time does not mean continuous crying time...)

Night 3:
Bedtime fuss time: 8 minutes
Sleep Stretch #1: 3hr 40min
Sleep Stretch #2: 3hr
Sleep Stretch #3: 2hr 35min
Total Sleep: 9hr 15min

Night 4:
Bedtime fuss time: 8 minutes
Sleep Stretch #1: 4hr 35min
Sleep Stretch #2: 5hr
Sleep Stretch #3: 1hr
Total Sleep: 10hr 35min

Night 5:
Bedtime fuss time: 18 minutes
(interrupted by coughing fit...)
Sleep Stretch #1: 3hr 50min
Sleep Stretch #2: 5hr 30min
Total Sleep: 9hr 20min

Night 6:
Bedtime fuss time: 1 minute!
Sleep Stretch #1: 6hr 45min
Sleep Stretch #2: 3hr 30min
Total Sleep: 10hr 15min

Night 7:
Bedtime fuss time: 2 minutes
Sleep Stretch #1: 5hr 50min
Sleep Stretch #2: 1hr 50min
Sleep Stretch #3: 2hr
Total Sleep: 9hr 40min

Tonight is Night 8 and she's supposed to go the whole night without a feeding, so we'll see how that goes. She only fussed for 5 minutes, so she's still doing well.

I should add that she developed some seasonal allergies (sneezing, coughing, no fever) right in the middle of our sleep training, but she's still doing really well. She was coughing in her sleep and I was afraid the whole process would be derailed, but thankfully not. The only "problem" now is that she knows the wind-down process and she starts to fuss right when I turn out the light. I'm always holding her when I turn the lights off and she leans back in protest, because she knows what's coming. I know she's tired and she knows she's tired, but she just has to give me that little protesting cry before nodding off to Dreamland.

I think the Ferber Method was a success for us, this time around, and I am so very pleased. I truly believe that she cries less now, using a "cry" method, than she did when trying either no method or the "no-cry" method. If there are mothers out there not getting any sleep night after night after night, I would like to tell them that Ferber is not the Devil and your baby won't die if he/she has to cry for a few minutes. Instead they (and you) will get the rest they need and be all the better for it. I know this method doesn't work for everyone and not all babies adjust quickly, but it's a viable, humane option and not an exercise in baby torture, like some would have you believe.

Crib Recall!

First off, let me say that if you are not already on their mailing list, please go to the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission's website at http://www.cpsc.gov and sign up. They will send you email notifications about product recalls that could save your child's life!

I received one such email yesterday for my daughter's Simplicity drop-side crib: http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml09/09260.html

I also received an email directly from Wal-Mart.com, which is where I ordered the crib, using their "Site-to-Store" feature. I checked the model/serial number on the bottom of her crib and, sure enough, it was on the recall list. I also called Wal-Mart customer service to confirm. I had bought the crib as part of Simplicity's "Nursery in a Box" set, which comes with a crib, changing table and dresser. I called Wal-Mart and they said I could just take the crib back and not the other pieces, as I explained that we had clothes in the drawers and items on the shelves of the changing table.

I was not going to let my daughter sleep one more night in that possible death-trap, so I disassembled the crib and we loaded it up in the truck bed and headed off to Wal-Mart. Just as we're driving up to Wal-Mart we see this HUGE wall of rain headed our way. It has barely rained 3 drops in months and now that we're carting a crib in the truck bed, it has to rain. We get the crib inside, ahead of the rain and take it to the customer service department. They didn't give us any trouble. We didn't have our receipt or anything, but they gave us a full refund for the cost of the entire set, which was amazing. We then went to pick out a new crib. There were only 2 brands left that weren't recalled, so we got the white one, to match her furniture and checked out. When we get outside, it's raining cats and dogs! We're got Morgan with us and so we're trying to get the crib in the back (the employees helped with that) and the car seat in the car and the stroller had to go in the back, too. My poor, beautiful stroller got doused. Anyway, we get home and we had called my dad to meet us at the house to bring in the crib, because Greg hurt his back and shouldn't lift anything heavy. My dad arrives and it's still pouring down. He helps bring the crib in one piece at a time and that's when they see that both the front and back boards are broken. One is slightly cracked and the other is flat out broken and splintered. Grr! We call Wal-Mart and ask that they bring another crib box to Customer Service and let us exchange just the broken parts, since we're not loading that thing up again. They agreed and my husband went to exchange the pieces. My husband and my dad got the crib all set up and just in time, because Morgan was so tired and fussy.

She went right to sleep in her new, hopefully safe, crib...for an hour...oh well, I guess her new crib didn't change anything, but at least I know she's not in a death-trap...until the next recall comes out...

Some days...

...it doesn't pay to leave the house!

Morgan woke up in a good mood, not that she slept very well, but she was very happy in the morning, as you can see:

I fed her at 10:30 a.m. and then agreed to meet up with someone from Craigslist to buy an enormous plush caterpillar. We agreed to meet at around 11:30 in a Wal-Mart parking lot. We recently installed a new car seat, because Morgan's getting too big for her first one. Now, I have to take her out of the seat, instead of taking the carrier out of the base. Anyway, I loaded her into the car and gave her a little sip of milk, just to make sure she wasn't hungry/thirsty. She was happy and content and off we went. About 3/4 of the way there, she starts rubbing her arms on the restraints, trying to scratch them. She's always wanting to scratch her arms and I'm trying to tell her to stop, but how do you tell a 7 1/2 month old anything? Just as I'm turning into the Wal-Mart parking lot I hear her cry and look in the baby-view mirror and she's spewing milk, projectile-style and choking. I panic, put on my hazard lights and pull into a spot out of traffic, but it's not really a parking spot. I leave the car on, jump out and into the back seat and frantically undo the buckles and pull her out. She's screaming because she finally cleared the milk from her throat and was understandably scared by having been choking. She's covered in soy formula and so is the bottom of the car seat. I think she spit up even more than I fed her. I've never seen this level of expulsion from her and it scared me. I was just glad I wasn't still on the highway, because things may have been worse. I pulled that car into the first available section of pavement and flew to my choking baby. Out on the highway, I might have swerved and I'm just getting used to my new Honda CR-V and SUVs (well, it's a "crossover") can roll if you're not careful.

Anyway, she calmed down after I got her out of the seat and I attempted to sop up some of the mess with burp cloths. I temporarily put her in the seat, unrestrained, and she was happy playin with the straps (she *loves* straps). She was too wet and I forgot a change of clothes, so I loaded her into the stroller and we went into Wal-Mart to buy her another onesie. Oh, and I had parked at the far end of the parking lot and she would not let me put her back in that car seat, so I had to walk the stroller all the way across the parking lot in the Texas heat. We go in, buy an outfit and proceed to the bathroom to change. I haven't blogged in a while, so I'm sure I haven't mentioned Morgan's intense fear of flushing public toilets. I know it must sounds like a swooshing vortex of evil, but you'd think she'd get used to it after a while. I found this out a couple of weeks ago in a Luby's bathroom. I was changing her diaper and every time someone would flush, she's looked panicked and scream. I even took her into a stall to show her where the noise was coming from and she was still freaking out. I held her tight, but she didn't want anything to do with it. So, there we are in the Wal-Mart bathroom and someone comes in and flushes and she gives me that look - "it's the evil swooshing vortex!!" and starts to scream. I console her and lay her back down and she screams again. After lots of picking up and putting down, I get her changed and then she doesn't want to get in the stroller, because she's still scared. I strap her in anyway, so we can get away from the bathroom. Then, she doesn't want to get back in the car seat, as she is assuredly reliving her recent choking trauma. I fixed her a bottle of juice to rehydrate her and that pacified her enough to get her in the car. I drove through the get some lunch and then went to a friend's to drop off a birthday present and we headed home. She seemed pretty happy and I had given her the juice bottle to hold, but she kept turning it upside down and the nipple was resting on the seat and I just knew juice was leaking everywhere. I really didn't care at that point, though, since it was going to be washed anyway. She fell asleep about 1/2 way home, but woke up just as we were getting into the neighborhood. She was fussing a little and when I pulled into the garage, she was wiggly. I parked, got out and as I was rounding the car, I heard her scream. I opened the door and she let out another scream and spewed juice everywhere. She started choking again and I fumbled to get her out of the seat and held her as she continued to vomit juice all over me. I didn't care one bit, though, as I was more worried about her choking and I felt so bad for her. I don't think she has ever thrown up in her life and I know I hate that feeling. It's not like spitting up, where it just runs out her mouth. She was actually heaving and choking and sputtering. I was near tears wondering what was wrong with her.

She finally stops spewing and I call my husband. I tell him what's going on and that I'm going to call the doctor. I then call the doctor's office and they make me an appointment for 2 hours later. Next, I call my dad to come over and take care of Morgan while I get the car cleaned up a little. I had to install the old car seat so I could drive her to the doctor, since the new one was saturated. My dad came over and Morgan was happy as a clam, like nothing happened. She didn't have a fever or anything. I fed her again and she kept it down for half an hour, so I called to cancel the doctor's appointment. She was perfectly fine the rest of the day and I think it was just a fluke. I think it was a combination of too many air bubbles from these cheap bottles I bought her (I got them so she could grip them better) and car sickness.

Anyway, we went through all that so we could get this ginormous caterpillar:

I guess all's well that ends well... :Þ

It's Father's Day!

Wow, the time just flies on by, doesn't it? Today was my husband's first Father's Day (unless you count the one while Morgan was in my belly...) His parents and my parents came over for dinner and we had yummy grilled fajitas. It was so nice to have all the "daddies" together.

This little girl has a lot of people to love her and it makes me so happy!

She's getting a little better at sleeping at night. She doesn't sleep through the night by any means, but she can sleep 3 hours at a time, some nights. She went to bed "early" tonight (7:30 p.m.) so who knows what the night will bring. I cannot believe she's 7 months and 5 days old. I weighed her today and she is so close to 21 pounds. I'm not really looking forward to upgrading her car seat, because I won't be able to take the car seat out of the base. I'll have to take her out of the seat and that won't be fun when she falls asleep in the car, which is almost always. How do people do it? She's not really great at being in the restuarant high chairs, yet. She bucks and wiggles, but I'm wondering if that kind of thing gets any better. Oh well, maybe it'll take her a while to gain that last pound before hitting the weight limit and in the meantime, I can work on her highchair skills. I guess I better head to bed soon, because she had already been asleep for 1:20 and might be up in a little while.

Oh, but first, a little about her food. I've stretched her bottles out to every 3 hours, but lately she drinks 2 oz. really fast and takes FOR-E-VER to finish the other 4 ounces. I've given her some "Stage 2" vegetables and she seems to really like them. She has also been eating those "Baby Mum-Mum" rice husk snacks, to practice her chewing skills. I get so nervous when she's eating anything like that, but I need to give her practice. She doesn't really like those puffs, yet, but I guess those are for "crawlers" and she's not quite there, yet. She scoots herself backwards and can pivot in a circle, but she isn't crawling. She can hold herself up pretty well on one of her toys, if I put her up to it. She can't pull up or anything, but she can sit really well.

OK, I really need to get to bed - I'm sleeeeeepy...sorry, if I've been rambling!

Is it June already?

Hmm, it has been a while since my last post. Let's see...well, lately I've been trying to do some "sleep training" because Morgan was waking up 3-4 times a night and I was hoping to get to 1-2 times a night. We've been reading The No Cry Sleep Solution since I'd really like to avoid having Morgan cry-it-out. It hasn't really been working, though. The main thing I've been working on is getting her to put herself to sleep, instead of letting her fall asleep at the bottle. She HATES that and gets very mad. I've been resorting to giving her the bottle and then she falls asleep 2 minutes later. However, she does not stay asleep long. Last night she woke up and cried at the end of every sleep cycle, which is about 45 minutes to an hour. She woke up 4 times before midnight and I finally just took her into the bed with me so I could get 2 hours of sleep. I still had to feed her a few times and I moved her back to the crib at 5, but she wasn't having any of it, so back to my bed, we went...It seems like it's getting worse, rather than better. Before, she would sometimes sleep 9p-12a, then 12a-3a and then up again around 5a. Now, she goes to bed around 8:30p and gets up at 9:30p, 10:30p, 11:30p, etc. I've tried moving her bedtime earlier, but if we put her to bed at 7:30p, she just gets up at 9, 10, etc. I tried a pacifier and she didn't like it - it just made her more upset. I know every baby is different, but I wish there was a magic fix that would make her sleep just 3 hours at a time. Is that too much to ask? I could handle getting up 2-3 times a night, really. It's the 4/5/6+ times a night that's killing me.

We decided to take a trip to the beach, but that was a bit of a fiasco. The hotel said they had a crib and brought us this deep, metal death-trap. There was no way I was putting my baby in that thing. When bedtime came, I just cleared space in the bed and let her sleep with me and my husband slept in the second bed. It took quite a while for her to settle and she slept about 2 1/2 hours, but after that she was up every hour or so. She even had a stretch around 2-3:30 a.m. where she would not go back to sleep. The next day, we went to eat at our favorite restaurant where they dump the shrimp boil on the table. Well, that does not work when you have a 6-month old in tow. We had her in the high chair, away from the table, but she kept bucking and wanted out. My husband ended up holding her while I ate, and then I held her while he ate. The next morning, we took her to the beach. We wanted to go early to avoid the heat. She fell asleep literally the moment we parked the car at the beach. So, my husband went out and swam a little in the ocean while I sat with her in the truck. After her nap, my husband took her to the shoreline and dipped her feet in the wet sand. She didn't fuss or cry, but she didn't smile, either. I don't think she knew what to make of it. My husband's parents were going to come for a visit later that day and stay with us in the hotel, but my husband didn't think that would go very well, with Morgan not sleeping and all, so he called them and told them that we'd be heading home early. Unfortuntately, we had a non-refundable reservation, so we couldn't get any money back for the lost night. We headed home, anyway, and she still woke up every hour, but at least we were home.

Last night, Sunday, was a pretty good night for Morgan sleep-wise. I decided that I was going to just give her the bottle and let her fall asleep drinking her milk, since it always seemed to make her so happy and I'd try to figure something else out. Greg took her for a walk in the park and she fell asleep. She napped from around 7:30 p.m. - 8:15 p.m., so I thought we were going to be in trouble. When she woke up, I got her in her jammies and made her a bedtime bottle. She drank and fell asleep and I got to see those sweet sleep smiles again. When she has had a good drink, she makes these little smiles in her sleep. I moved her to the crib around 8:55 p.m. and she went right to sleep. BUT, she woke up 10 minutes later and I have no idea why. We got her back to sleep at 9:05 p.m. I fell asleep around 9:40 p.m. and I think she woke up about 10 minutes later. My husband went to get her and put her back to sleep. I know, this isn't sounding like a good night, so far. However, after finally getting to sleep around 10, she stayed asleep until about 1 a.m., so that was 3 hours! I fed her a couple of ounces and she went back to sleep. She made a peep at 3 a.m., but I realized she wasn't really awake, so I left her alone. She slept until 4 a.m., which was another 3 hours. I fed her at about 4 a.m. and she slept until about 7:20 a.m. She did make a few peeps at 6:40 and 7 a.m., and I actually went to get her out of bed at 7:20 a.m. I wanted to try to keep her close to her normal wake-up time. Overall, with three 3-hour sleep stretches, I'd say it was a great night!

We don't know how to repeat the process, though. I am thinking we don't want to be in the habit of letting her nap at 7:30 p.m. We can't really put her to bed at that time, either, because she doesn't stay asleep long. Well, we just have to keep working on it, but I am grateful for every night that she sleeps more than 2 hours at a time.

6-Month Update

I have a bit of a cold, so I'm just going to copy/paste the email I sent out to family and friends. :P

Morgan turned 6 months old this past weekend! She is getting to be such a big girl. She had her 6-month checkup today. She weighed 19 lbs. 12 oz. and is 26.5 inches tall. She’s in the 95th percentile for weight and the 75th for height. She was also in the 90th percentile for head circumference, but I can’t recall the measurement. She got another set of shots, which she was not happy about, but there are no more shots until her 12-month appointment. If placed in a sitting position, she can sit up by herself and play with her toys. She loves to grab anything she can get her hands on and put it in her mouth. She is drooling rivers, but still no teeth, yet. She had her first “Baby and Me” swim class on Monday. Greg took her in the water, because I had/have a cold. Despite my best efforts, Morgan caught a little of my cold, too, but we don’t have a fever, so that’s good. For my birthday, I bought Morgan the Fisher Price Laugh & Learn Kitchen. J She eating some solid foods now. Her favorite is green beans and she doesn’t really like the fruits – go figure. She’s working on being able to hold her own bottle. Her sleeping patterns are not in one (a pattern) – they are all over the place. One night, she slept 5 hours, then the next 3 nights she was up every 1.5-2 hours. She’s working on it, though. We took her to Sear Portrait Studio on Saturday and I will include a link to those photos. I think she looks just like her Daddy and everyone says she looks like me. I guess she’s a little of both, as is to be expected.

Here are some pictures from the 6-month portrait session:

Almost 6 months old!

Wow, it has been a long time since I've posted. I just don't seem to find the time much, but I'm trying to keep it up. Morgan will be 6 months old this weekend and I can't believe it. She is so "talkative" now and makes soft and loud noises, testing out her voice and it's so cute. We're going to Sears Portrait Studio on Saturday and that should be fun. I'm also going to a "Mother's Night In" at a friend's house on Saturday, so I'm very excited.

Morgan has been eating solid foods, again, and it's going pretty well. She eats green beans and carrots, mostly. I tried to give her pears and she made a sour face, it was pretty funny. It's also funny that she eats her green beans with such enthusiasm, and then makes faces at her fruit. I guess that's a good thing. I gave her sweet peas one day and that afternoon she broke out on the side of her head. I don't know if it was related, but I'm stopping the sweet peas for a while. My husband feeds her baby oatmeal cereal in the morning, and I also give her diluted juice once a day, to help with constipation. My poor baby cries so hard sometimes, when it's time to make a poopie diaper. It's so sad to watch. Maybe I need to throw prunes back into the mix.

She hadn't been sleeping very well, getting up about every 1.5-2 hours. Then, yesterday, one of the mommies in the playgroup posted a thread on the messageboard asking for tips on getting baby to sleep better. Most sleep training involved getting your baby to the crib drowsy, but awake, so they can put themselves to sleep. I wasn't planning on trying that last night, but it just so happened that she was too full for her bedtime feeding, so I just had to put her to bed awake. She smiled at me in the dark and wiggled around, but I turned on the humidifier (which makes white noise) and that's what I use, nightly, as her "time for bed" signal. I left the room and I could hear her wiggling around and came back a couple of times and she was on her side, still wiggling. I came back a third time and she was asleep! :O She slept from 8:45pm-12:45am! Four hours is A LOT for her. I fed her a little and then she slept from 1:00am-4:45am! That was almost another 4 hours. I changed her diaper and fed her and put her back in the crib and she slept until 6:20am. Wow! I got about 8 hours of sleep, with only 2 interruptions. As usual, this could be a fluke, but I hope not. :)

After some waiting on a decision from my husband, we've decided to enroll Morgan is a "Baby & Me" swimming class. I want her to become familiar with the water and learn some water safety skills. I think it's best to start her out young, so she isn't afraid. I'm very excited, but it's so pricey - $70/month! That covers one 30-minute class a week. They told me when I first toured the place that they had "Open Swim" on Friday nights, for extra practice time. What they didn't tell me, was that it's $4 per person over age 4. If we (my husband and I) went every Friday, that'd be an extra $32 per month! They give you a $25 credit per person you refer and hopefully I can get a few and that will help offset the cost.

Morgan's 6-month appointment is on the 20th, so we'll see what all her stats are, then. Last time I weighed her, she weighed 19.5 pounds! I'm not looking forward to her shots, again. She tolerates them well, but it's still no fun at all.

We bought her a walker a while back and she loves it. The only place she can use it is the kitchen, but she loves to move around. She still loves her Precious Planet Jumperoo and Baby Einstein Exersaucer. Oh, and she can now sit up! I can sit her on the floor and put toys in front of her and she'll play. :) I put pillows or the Boppy behind her, though, because she does topple over every once in a while. Well, it's time to change another diaper. Here are a few pictures and videos for the road:

If it's not one thing, it's another...

Wow, it has been a long time. Since I'm not pumping at 2 a.m., I don't have my guaranteed blog time any more. I haven't really been getting that much more sleep, though. She does sleep 2-3 hours at a time, but some nights she's still up every 1-2 hours. Morgan's eczema is pretty well under control and her cradle cap is all gone. She has some hair now:

Just when I think I'm getting the hang of things, I see these red spots on the inside back of Morgan's leg. After a day or so, it was looking awful, so I took her to the pediatrician to have it checked out. They told me she had a staph infection. A staph infection?? I couldn't believe it. My poor baby! She didn't seem to even know she had an infection, thankfully, but I felt so bad for her. The pediatrician gave me some antibiotic cream and said if it didn't start to heal in a couple of days, to give her an oral antibiotic. After a couple of days, it looked different, but I couldn't tell if it was healing and I didn't want to start her on the oral antibiotics unless I had to, so I took her to see her dermatologist. He said it would be better to use antibiotic ointments, rather than creams, to avoid burning/stinging her skin, so he gave me a prescription. He also gave me one for a steroid ointment to help speed healing. He then said we could give her a short round of oral antibiotics to really accelerate the healing, so I agreed. When I got that prescription, it said to give her 3 tsp. for 3 days, then 2 tsp. for 3 days and 1 tsp. for 3 days. Um, that's a total of 9 days. I didn't think that constituted a "short" round of antibiotics. I called the office and they said to give her the medicine for 9 days. I gave her the first dose and 3 tsp. is a lot for a baby. It was 6 small syringes full. Ugh! Later that evening, I was going over the medicines with my husband and I realized that it was not an oral antibiotic, but an oral corticosteroid! Yikes! How did I miss that? I thought for sure the dermatologist said antibiotic. I was all worried and feeling bad because I did NOT want to give her oral steroids - even more than I didn't want to give her antibiotics. I called the dermatologist's office in the morning and asked if I could stop giving her the corticosteroid and they said it was OK. I just continued to use the antibiotic and steroid ointments. It's slowly healing, and I have to change the dressing 3 times a day. This is now on top of the normal eczema regimen.

We went to a friend's baby shower this weekend and we stayed at my husband's parents' house. Morgan was so happy to see them. She loves her grandparents:

At the baby shower, I got to see a lot of my friends that I hadn't seen in a while and their babies. One of those poor, sweet, precious babies somehow contracted hand, foot, and mouth disease and they didn't know it until after the party. Where do our babies get these things? You'd think we all live in a third-world country or something. There's also an outbreak of swine flu in a neighboring city and the whole school district is shut down for a week. I have to keep an eye on my baby's staph infection, and keep an eye out for hand, foot, and mouth disease and swine flu! Sheesh!

Despite it all, she continues to be her happy self. Here she is working on sitting up like a big girl:

I'm so glad she's such a smiley, happy baby. All of these things would so much harder to bear if I thought she was miserable all the time. Keep on smiling, Morgan!

Could it have been my milk all along?

My original breastfeeding goal, from before I even had Morgan, was 6 months. Then, after I had her and we hit the 6-week mark, I ran into issues with oversupply and overactive letdown, so I started to pump exclusively. For anyone who doesn't know, that is a crazy amount of work. Not only are you "breastfeeding", you're bottle feeding, too. You have to pump for a total of 2 hours a day, plus milk handling time, plus feeding time and bottle/equipment cleaning time. Where does sleep time fit in there? It doesn't, really. To get a good output you have to pump once between the hours of 1 a.m. and 5 a.m., when your prolactin levels are highest. This really only applies for the first 12 weeks postpartum, but I found a high output even after 12 weeks, so I continued to pump around 2 a.m. each night. I started out pumping 8 times a day, then worked down to 7 times a day, then 6 and then 5 times. I pumped the days away, hoping that I was giving Morgan an immunological boost and I believe I did so, but in the end I had to stop breast feeding, as something in my milk was irritating her skin. We weren't sure at first, so we started giving her soy formula and I kept pumping to keep my supply up, just in case. Well, after a few days on full-time soy formula, her face magically cleared up, as did most of the patches on her body. It was an amazing transformation. Once we saw the drastic improvement, we decided we didn't want to risk adding any breast milk back to her diet, so I started the process to wean from the pump. Ouch! That was pretty painful. I pumped for like 2-3 minutes when I was very engorged - just enough to relieve the pressure. I wore cabbage leaves in my bra (yes, it works), drank sage tea, etc. I soaked through a whole bunch of bra pads, but my milk is pretty much gone after about 2 weeks. That's not bad, considering that I thought it would take 6 weeks to complete the process. I was a little aggressive in my efforts, only pumping when I absolutely had to, so that sped things up.

Morgan was baptised on Easter Sunday and it was nice. The poor thing had a little flare up of her eczema, though, but it wasn't too bad. I forgot to wash her baptismal gown (bad mommy!) and that might have irritated her skin. She was very well-behaved and the only time she cried was when they went to pour the water on her head. It wasn't because of the water, but because she bucked in my husband's arms and the deacon bopped her on the head with the water pitcher. Poor baby! She let out quite a cry and everyone thought it was because of the water. Other than that, she was a happy, albeit wiggly, baby. Here are a couple of pictures from the day:

The cradle cap on her head is also almost 100% healed, too. It's really amazing. I thought it would never go away. You can actually see her hair, now, not that she has much.

She's just a super happy baby in the day time. She smiles such a precious smile and I almost can't stand it. It's just in the evenings, that she gets a little fussy. I think at night, there isn't anything to distract her from what ails her and she's alone with her gas pains and itchy skin.

Her tummy is still adjusting to the switch to soy, and her stools are getting a little softer day by day. My poor baby's face turns tomato-red when she strains sometimes.

It has been about 11 days since I blogged, so I'm trying to think of what I'm forgetting. I took her to lunch where I used to work. She was all smiles.

Today she has her follow-up appointment with the dermatologist. I think he's going to be amazed at her progress. I know I am!

I think she's going through a growth spurt, even though one isn't due for another month. She has been very hungry last night and this morning. She's mastering so many of her toys and it's amazing to see all the faces she makes and she's developing her own little personality. She turned 5 months old yesterday!

Well, I better go get a few things done around the house. She's content in her jumperoo. :)

Oh, what a relief it is...

We switched Morgan over to soy formula full time the other day and then the wait began for the next poopie diaper. She was wiggling and grunting, but we didn't see anything for 3 days. Then, yesterday, after another grunting session, she finally made a poopie diaper - 3 poopie diapers! I went to change the first one and it was full of a brownish-gray paste and it smelled like doggie doo. Then, as I was changing her, she pooped in the second diaper. I thought for sure she was done, considering the volume of poo, but she somehow found some more for the third diaper I put on her. I'm just really glad she finally pooped, though. She was SO happy after that!

Here she is playing in her exersaucer, happy as can be:

Poopy, poopy, and more poopy...

It's funny how you wake up one day and realize that most of your thought processes now revolve around baby poop - it's color, consistency, smell, etc.

We started Morgan on solids last week. We started with rice cereal, but she really didn't seem very interested. We also got some carrot baby food. She really liked that and we gave her about 1/4 tub the first time. The next day, she seems really hungry and she ate the other 3/4 of the tub! Well, I think that was too much because she didn't poop until two days later. She was fussing and wriggling, but nothing would pass. I decided to put her in the jumperoo, to see if the bouncing and gravity would help things along. Oh boy, did they ever! She was happily jumping along and then she paused and was making some serious faces and grunts and then *POW*! We heard a big poopy noise and I thought I'd better get her out of there before she blew again and blew out of the diaper. When I picked her up, there was a thin line of poop seeping through above the diaper line and I knew I was too late, but it was just above the diaper, so I figured it wasn't too bad. I get her to the changing table and I open up her clothes to the sight of the hugest baby blowout. Her poopy looked just like the carrots that went in and it had blown all up her back and the diaper was so full. She only had 3/4 of a small tub, but it had multiplied and combined with her milk and cereal to make SUPER POO! Needless to say, we're going to hold off on the carrots for a while and when we start them back, she'll only get 1/4 tub at a time.

We started giving her baby oatmeal and she really likes that.

I just prepare one heaping spoonful with a lot of breastmilk to dilute it. She now opens her mouth and chomps at the spoon and eats it up like a pro. I was going to start one bottle of soy formula a day, to see how she does on it, but I waited a day after the big poopy blowout to give her a break. Yesterday, I gave her the first 2-0z. bottle of soy formula. She drank it right up, and now I'm waiting for the poop report. She has been very gassy, but I don't think that can be all the soy's fault since she had 34+ oz. of breastmilk and only 2 oz. of soy formula. Last night she didn't sleep well and was wriggling and tooting and trying to pass what I can only guess is a ginormous gas bubble. She kept rolling over on to her side, and ended up sleeping on her side a couple of times. Poor thing... She's in the bassinet beside me, at the moment, trying to work on her morning poopy. There she lies broken-hearted, wanted to poop, but only farted...

Another Day, Another Diagnosis

TMI warning, before you begin reading...there will be talk of poopy...

Well, Morgan had been having a little trouble in the poopy department and hadn't gone in a couple of days. This morning she finally went and I was happy until I saw the contents of her diaper. The stool was very runny and full of mucous. She pooped a little while later and it was still light brown and mucousy. A few more hours later and she made another poopy diaper, but this time is was green and mucousy. I didn't like that at all. I googled "green mucousy stool" and found that there are usually two possible causes. One is a milk-protein allergy and the other is a foremilk/hindmilk imbalance in breast milk. I called the pediatrician's office and they said I could come in at 4:30 p.m. at their office half-way across town. I wanted to see if there was some way they could test Morgan to find out, definitively, if she had a milk allergy. At some point, she'll be on formula and I needed to know whether we'd be going down the $Nutramigen$ route or using some other formula. Also, if it was a hindmilk/foremilk imbalance, she'd be going to formula sooner, rather than later.

So, I get there early (4:10) because I left early expecting lots of traffic, but traffic was pretty light. They didn't get me into a room until around almost 5:00. The nurse had me undress Morgan and we got her weight (17 lbs. 11 oz.) and she asked the reason for my visit, which I explained. I then proceeded to wait another 30 minutes in that room. Poor Morgan is only in her diaper and wiggling like crazy and I'm trying to cover her with her clothes and burp cloth, thinking that the Dr. should be in any minute. After about 20 minutes, I open the door and one of the nurses is cleaning off the scale and I asked her what time they close and she said they closed at 5:00. I asked about the doctor and she said he just came out of another room and would be with me shortly. When he finally came in, I had been waiting for an hour. He apologized and said that he was assigned certain rooms and they did not tell him that the room I was in was one of them. *Sigh*

At that ped. office, there are several doctors and we've seen 3 of them and one nurse practitioner. I like the doctor we saw today and hadn't seen him since Morgan was a couple of weeks old.

I explained Morgan's stool situation and told him that I basically wanted to know which kind of formula she'd need to be on when the time came and I wanted to know the cause of her green, mucousy stool.

He said, "I don't have anything bad to tell you. I've had to tell other patients today that they've had an ear infection and another bronchitis, but I don't have any of that to tell you. Morgan is suffering from 'well loved/well fed/well taken care of syndrome'". He showed me her growth chart and her dots were off the charts. He said she's growing a little faster than she should be, but that's not a terrible thing. However, she is eating too much and this excess protein is disrupting her system. Her body is overloaded with excess protein and that's basically what an allergy is - a reaction to proteins. I asked if she had a milk allergy and he said that everyone does. Nobody should really drink cow's milk and that we in the U.S. are the only ones who really drink it and that other countries hardly ever drink cow's milk. I asked him why so many of the main formulas are cow's milk-based and he said he didn't know and that's just the way the American companies do things. He said she should eat a soy formula, that is lactose free. He said there's a small chance that she'll have a problem with soy, but he didn't think it was likely. I asked if she needed the $Nutramigen$ and he said no and that he only puts about 3-5 babies on that a year. (Well, he needs to talk to his colleagues, since they were just pushing it on me last week...) He said that it is true that some of the dairy I eat, passes through, but if we get her portions/intake under control that it would lessen the effects. He said to start her on rice cereal, in a bowl, and not in her bottle. I asked about allergies and he said, "do you know anyone with a rice allergy?" He said we start with rice, since it's the least allergenic. Anyway, he said we need to slowly move her towards a "breakfast/lunch/dinner" routine with a few other meals in between. He said to offer her some milk and then some rice cereal. After a while, we'd go to vegetables, then fruits, then meats. He said she could tell me when she was hungry, but I had to tell her when she was done eating. He said if I wait until she stops herself, then she will have overeaten. He said to wait until the first big pause and end that feeding. I asked how much I should feed her then and he said, "do you eat the same exact amount every day?" and suggested that I just try to change her habits. He said my husband and I should "talk up" the meals and explain to her what we're doing while we mix the cereal, so she learns that food takes time to prepare and that she'll be fed a proper amount - not too much and not too little.

That'll be interesting. Morgan is VERY impatient when it comes to her food, so I'm not sure she'll take it too well, but it is true that we'll have to try. She can't be a grazer for the rest of her life. Even though what the ped. said is different than all the other doctors, it made sense to me. If I pigged out and ate a large pizza at every meal, every day, my system would have problems, too. He said I was lucky to even be able to exclusively (over)feed her breast milk, especially being a first-time mom. She's well fed, but too well fed, I guess. He just wants to see her growth get more in line with the charts and he believes that settling her intake will improve all her issues, including her eczema. I guess we'll have to give it a try.

Well, gee whiz...

It's a good thing we waited to talk to the dermatologist before starting Morgan on Nutramigen. He said her eczema has nothing to do with what I'm eating. He said that only happens in about 1% of cases. He said the actual culprit was frequent bathing. He said water is the enemy for people with eczema, stripping their skin of its barrier protection. He said to bath her just once a week and for cleaning in between baths we could use Cetaphil and wipe it off with a cloth or paper towel - just NO WATER! I told him that the pediatrician suggested a Nutramigen formula trial for her eczema and possible reflux and he said not to do it for the eczema. That's fine with me, because that Nutramigen would be like $2,000! The ped. gave us Zantac, so our newest plan-of-the-day is to wait and watch her and see if she still exhibits the symptoms of reflux. If so, we can give her the Zantac. That is, of course, if the Tucker Sling we ordered, doesn't help. We want to try and exhaust our physical and behavioral options, before using the medicinal options. I'm glad to know that what I'm eating isn't bothering her. I was thinking/hoping that might be the case, especially when I had added diary back to my diet and her face cleared up, instead of getting worse.

I am still worried about my milk supply, though. It has peaks and valleys and I don't know what's going on or what has changed. I know the normal reasons for a drop in supply and none of them apply. Well, stress can drop your supply and I have been stressing. I want to keep feeding her breastmilk up until 6 months and then try to fix my overactive let-down. I don't want to fix it now, for fear of dropping my supply even more. If it drops after 6 months, I won't feel as bad, since 6 months was my original breastfeeding goal. If I can get her back to breastfeeding directly, I won't have to hassle with pumping and I could just pump the occasional bottle or use a bottle or two of formula. She'll be starting solid foods by then, so there should be other feeding options, should I need to be away from her for a few hours to run errands or something.

Well, I do feel better...now I just need to figure out what's up with my milk supply...

My baby is 4 months old!

Morgan had her 4-month pediatrician appointment today. I had so many things to say and questions to ask and I was talking a mile a minute. She weighed 17 lbs. 5 oz., which put her past the 95th percentile for weight. Her head circumference was 43 cm, which is past the 90th percentile and her length was 25 inches, which is in the 75th percentile. Her eczema is still present on her body, but her face really cleared up today. We have no idea why, since I have been eating cheese (dairy) and she's back on my breastmilk. Oh, that's right, I didn't blog about what we did last week.

We thought we'd do a trial of formula, but we weren't very smart about it. We used a Walgreens Gentle brand, which is equal to the Enfamil Gentlease formula. I wanted to see if it would help her reflux/tummy issues. Well, what I failed to think about is that we're trying to see if any milk proteins are coming from my diet into her milk and this formula is definitely milk-based, so what exactly were we testing. We did that formula for 2 days and I continued to pump to keep my supply up. I tried to drop down to 5 pumps a day and it caused my supply to drop somewhat. At 4 a.m., on the second night of the formula trial, it occurred to me that this wasn't a true test of anything and she wasn't improving, so she'd be better off back on my milk until we figured things out. When she pooped out that formula the next morning, it was the most vile, horrendous thing I'd ever seen or smelled. My poor, sweet baby had to pass mixing cement through her body.

So, she was back on my milk for 2 days and I was thinking I was going to cut out dairy, but it's just not possible. My diet is already so restricted. Her face was still red, but then today, it really started to clear up. Baffling... Here is a picture of my cutey-baby from today:

The only thing on the side of her cheek is the collection of small cuts and scratches that she inflicted on herself when scratching at her face. Her forehead and cheeks are otherwise all clear. Her body does still have spots, though.

I was telling the pediatrician about her reflux symptoms and he said both the eczema and reflux might be caused by a milk-protein allergy. He said this is not to be confued with a lactose intolerance, which I understood from my research. He gave us a prescription for Zantac, though, and said they've been using it for over 10 years on babies with great success. He also suggested using a hypoallergenic formula, like Enfamil Nutramigen, if an elimination diet wasn't possible. He didn't want to discourage my breastfeeding, though, but it was something we could try. I told him I was pumping, so I could keep my supply going, while we gave the formula a 10-14 day trial. He gave us 3 sample cans, which is great, because that formula is EXPENSIVE. If I were to feed it to her at 40 oz. a day for these next 8 months, it'd cost about $2,000! I'm looking into seeing if our insurance will cover it under "enteral formulae", which I know we have coverage for, but only for certain diagnoses.

Anyway, we've (for the moment) decided to hold off on the Zantac and give the formula a try, since it might help both the eczema and the reflx issues. We're going to wait until after tomorrow's dermatologist appointment, also, to see what they have to say about it. We also didn't want to make any changes today, since she just had her shots.

After she had that one awful cement diaper, all her stools have been running and mucousy and that's bothering me. They also smell different and haven't gone back to their normal consistency. I don't know if this is a residual affect of the formula, or if it's caused by my milk, which I have noticed has become more watery. Even though I've gone back to 6 pumping sessions a day, my supply hasn't fully recovered and that's making me nervous. Maybe I'm stressing out too much.

I'm glad that her face cleared up today, but it does make things very confusing. If I ate dairy and she's recovering, does that mean it's not the dairy? She still has reflux symptoms, so is it just that the dairy allergy causes rotating symptoms and she isn't going to have all the symptoms, all the time? *Scratching head*...

Well, it'll be interesting to hear what the dermatologist has to say. Oops, I better get to bed!

What to do, what to do...

*Sigh* I still don't know what to do about Morgan's eczema and acid reflux. I just don't know if it's something in my breastmilk or what...I keep debating whether I should do a formula trial. I could try regular formula and see if she has an allergy that's not dairy (eggs, wheat, etc.) and if that doesn't work, I can try the hypoallergenic formula and see if it's a dairy allergy, after all. I will continue to pump on my normal schedule and freeze the milk to maintain my supply, should we need to switch back to breastmilk. Honestly, I'm hoping the formula doesn't help, since I'd rather she get the benefits of breastmilk. I do, desperately, want to find a way to relieve all that ails her, though. My poor baby!

Her eczema flairs up out of nowhere. She was taking a nap and woke up like this:

(She was asleep in the crib and this picture was taken after I had moved her to the car seat. I had put vaseline on her face, so that's why it's shiny...)

I put the steroid gel on the side of her head. Here she is later in the day, looking a little better:

...and another picture even later in the day...

So, it does get better, but I can't figure out what makes it flare up, aside from heat.

On top of the eczema and reflux, I think she may be teething. :( She drools rivers and chews on her fingers and rubs her bottom gums. I see two white patches, but they've been there since she was about a month old. She is just so sad and uncomfortable sometimes, but she still spends a good amount of the day smiling and "talking", for which I'm very thankful.